Wednesday, January 5, 2005
Interesting last couple of days (actually it’s hard not to have an interesting day when you’ve just moved to a foreign country). We are now moved into a nice, little house that rents for 100$ a month. We are quite pleased with our find. It’s about five minutes outside of town in a ‘moobahn’, meaning village. It would probably be considered a middle class, Thai neighborhood, though there’s too much litter on the ground for my liking. Pok’s father has come out for a couple of days to paint the interior and we just got our bedroom set today. Splashed out a bit and got classy, three piece bed, armoire, and vanity table set that ran about 650$. Could have saved, but this is something we hope to have for a while and the stuff that was a couple hundred cheaper came with exposed screws and generally looked cheap. The place looks to have a lot of potential. I am a bit concerned about transportation into town and whether I made the right choice getting the place before the job, but frankly even a cheap guesthouse would have run about 250$ a month, double what we’re paying here. Plus, we are only locked into a six month contract, so I have to believe this is the right way to go. Funny enough, the lady down the street who stopped into to say hi today also speaks fairly fluent Japanese.

Saturday, January 08, 2005
Another several interesting days have passed. We have the interior of the place all painted and the bedroom is in place – looks really nice. We also picked up some nice, locally made curtains (I sound like some kind of vagabond Martha Stewart). Yesterday we stopped by the Honda dealership looking at a new Honda Jazz, basically a hatchback compact. The day before yesterday I did an interview at small private English school. The lady was pretty keen on me; and the school despite being a startup seems to be well organized. It was also obvious that a fair amount of money had gone into the space itself. That, at least, bodes well for them staying in business for a while. In other words, there’s someone with money behind the venture. It would be an interesting change. She (one of the co-partners) needs a teacher who can do business and test courses, so I would be fairly valuable. The salary and benefits are pretty good for this area, though nothing jaw-dropping. I am seriously considering it as opposed to one of the bigger schools. I think if it worked out it would be a very nice change from Nova, while being similar enough that the transition wouldn’t be too hard. The thing is with the big guys, you know you’re paycheck is assured, the ‘however’ is that you have relatively little value to the company as a whole, as much as you may be appreciated on a micro-level, hence when decisions are made to eliminate planning time, you’re not considered. That much kind of puts me off the big guys. Hard choice, but the upshot is that I think I have a full-time position if I want it.

Another entry for my mother to avoid – we took the motorcycle we’ve been borrowing to the village in order to pick up the remainder of our furniture and to visit Pok’s uncle to ask him to guarantee our car loan. Now, I probably should write this up with some more detail but the scene was pretty good. I guess this guy owns a telephone, but nobody really wanted to call and find out where he was, so instead we toured the northeast of Thailand looking for him. Finally, we find him with his ‘second wife’ camped out in back of a house in construction. I probably should jump back and mention why this particular individual could ‘guarantee’ our loan. It seems that he is employed by the national electric company, and being a government job this holds some weight. Anyway, we roll up on this guy and after what appeared to be some heated talk he agreed to it. Here’s the thing, in Isaan they have what must be considered the strangest body language-per-meaning in the world. They spend the majority of the conversation giving dismisive back-hand waves and eyes upward nods, all of which gives the non-speaker the impression that they’re constantly telling one another to get bent. So, when we went to ask this favor, my first impression was that this guy was telling us “not a chicken’s chance of a natural death” in terms of his help, but, as stated, that was far from the case.


Sunday, January 09, 2005
Another exhausting day of shopping and money spending. Looks like the car is ready to go as of Saturday. That means that I’m going to have to visit the ATM several times at least to ensure that I can pay 200,000Bht in cash, roughly the equivalent of five thousand US. We bought a living room set-up as well and that has also been put up.

Monday, January 10, 2005
Well, a bit of a snag with the house. It seems that landlords are shysters the world-over. Basically we are getting a good deal, but we were told, in fairly certain terms, that we could get a phone line if we desired, by extension the internet. According to my translator (and girlfriend) the guy is now saying that a phone line is not possible. I’m a bit pissed off at this development. That, and the other day the moronic landlord dropped by a can of propane that was leaking. When the Pok called him to complain he said, “Yeah, I knew it was leaking, but I didn’t think it was a big deal”. Fucking idiot. In an effort to see the silver lining in this cloud I am considering how much time I waste on the net that I can now throw into studying, writing or something else more productive.


Tuesday, January 11, 2005
The car saga continues as it seems the uncle is no longer qualified to guarantor a loan. Now we are paying a friend of a friend ten-thousand baht to perform the service. Somehow I didn’t imagine that farmer was going to be seen as a reliable guarantor for a loan. The lady from Be Smart school called me today as I was paying for food at The Big C, a department store we have made far too many trips to. I couldn’t quite understand all she was going on about, but I believe she wants to hire me to start a new course she’s opening. Hopefully this will turn into something full time. I have to go see her tomorrow. I’m having a good time getting situated, but not exactly stress-free. Also, I’ve been eating like a pig, a fact I attribute to one 45 kilo Thai girl I spend most of my time with, who, herself, can certainly put away the food. I got to get back on track with exercising.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005
Met with the ladies at Be Smart today. The plot is thickening indeed. They are interested in hiring me full time, but there are more hitches than I like. First and foremost, it seems they will only need me full-time for a couple of months and then I would go back to a part-time status. It also appears that they know little about the visa process, so that’s also a worry. Nonetheless, I have agreed to teach a two hour class every week starting on Saturday the 22nd. They won’t need me to go full time until the beginning of March. I will seriously start checking around about other schools, i.e. the big guys, AUA, ECC tomorrow. There still is something attractive about the laissez-faire attitude that exists at Be Smart, but I am not sure it’s enough to rope myself into a potentially bad situation for.

Friday, January 14, 2005
Yesterday was pure laziness. I have started to workout again. As always it’s easy to start something, but hard to maintain it. I have put on a few pounds/kilos this winter as leaving Japan and arriving in Thailand both made for a healthy amount of consumption. I think I’ll be able to drop the weight once I establish a routine. This morning is the first gray day I’ve experienced since arriving. That makes for 27 sunny days in a row – remarkable. I do find it hard to get stressed in Thailand to the same extent I do elsewhere, but let’s not forget I haven’t started working yet. We are supposed to go sign papers on the car today, and if Mitsui-Sumitomo is kind to me then we’ll also be able to pay the down payment and drive off with it. My first true car (excluding the one that was given to me in college and lasted for half a year). I feel like Toad in The Wind and the Willows, “motorcar, motorcar, motorcar!”

Saturday, January 15, 2005
Well, it’s done. We have successfully got ourselves a motorcar. Not without some fanfare, greasing of palms and a sleepover by Ma Song, who, incidentally is starting to “get on my tits” to quote a Londoner I used to work with. Perhaps it is time to end this entry as the motorcar awaits and we are, once again, driving to the village.

Sunday, January 23, 2005
A week passed and so much has transpired that I don’t know where to begin, or more precisely, when to begin. Last Monday we drove to Bangkok. There is a whole, frustrating story there, but to drive the five hundred or so kilometers through Thailand was quite something. I don’t know that I would do it again in the near future, but, still something indeed. We ended up returning the next day. Later in the week found us again in the village in an attempt to get her driver’s license. I say attempt, so you would be right to assume failure. In brighter news, I have just started teaching my first class. It is really enjoyable teaching a new nationality. There are seven people in the group and per stereotypes they are more energetic than the average Japanese student, though pronunciation is much more an issue with Thai speakers than Japanese. It’s too soon for me to say how this job is going to work out, I was told that I would be starting a TOEFL class this week, but, sure enough, come Saturday it was still waiting to fill. I don’t like how the school administration is living up to stereotypes in the efficiency department.

Wednesday, January 26, 2005
Pocky finally got her license yesterday on the second attempt. It was a day at home for me. A couple of seedy looking Brits with their Thai girlfriends on the back of their 100cc motos rolled up in front of the house yesterday as I was raking in front. One of the guys evidently lived in the neighborhood and was helping his mate get a place. Now it seems this mate owned a bar in Phuket that was, I assume, washed out or just gone bankrupt from the effects of the Tsunami. I didn’t really inquire too much. They wanted to know if the houses next door were for rent. I was trying to think of a way to put them off the neighborhood, but couldn’t quite come up with anything. One of the neighbors who is moving next month showed them her house, but I heard them mutter something about too expensive before driving off. The truth is, it’s not a bad area, but there is one thing about the place that subtlety irks me. There’s any empty lot in front of us and across the lot is some sort of small factory that pumps out “Maw Lam” music Monday – Friday, 7am to some time in the evening that I am never able to pin down, probably because it’s not consistent. For the neophyte, Maw Lam (pronounced like a Frenchman would ‘damn’) is a popular form of music in this part of Thailand, Isaan. The lyrics are in Lao and the music sounds like some crappy rock ballad with the main instrument being the electronic organ. At its better moments it is almost melodious, but more often just plain odious.
The Thai seem not only impervious to loud music being played at all hours of the day and night, they actually seem comforted by the endless vacarm. One of the first comments my girlfriend made about our neighborhood was that it was too quiet. I suppose the Thai are consistent in their attitude toward noise. Japan was undoubtedly the noisiest place I ever lived and yet the Japanese shot odd glances at people speaking too loudly on the train and driveled on endlessly about the how loud foreigners were. I couldn’t begin to remember the number of times that there were complaints around loud parties from Japanese neighbors of foreign residents (I don’t disagree necessarily), but never once did anyone seem upset about the loud motorcycles coming and going in the middle of the night (I’m not talking about the bosozoku gangs, but rather the University students that all owned bikes that were made intentionally loud, the latest trend has to do with a modified scooter that is almost as loud as a Harley). It would appear to me that as long as the noise in Japan is mechanized it’s OK. Trains, planes and automobiles are all all right – after all they are signs of how “modern” Japan is. But the second a human voice is heard…Oh no. I always found the dichotomy in noise relations one of the many ironies about Japan.

The telephone installation guy has just arrived. Now I am already generalizing about Thailand, but, contrary to stereotypes the Thai are efficient in some areas. Every thing we have bought relating to the house, mainly furniture, but also a gas stove and shower heater has been installed on the same day or shortly thereafter and usually in a timely fashion. It does kind of give me the impression, especially with the expensive furniture store, that there was a crew of delivery people just hanging out in the back with nothing to do before we came in. Still, I can’t complain about a lot of the service we have received here. In terms of living up to stereotypes, the Academic Director at Be Smart seems to be filling that role. Only last week she was keen on me starting a course this week, which has been postponed until who knows when. The nice thing about the Thais is that they don’t get too upset when things (dishes, plates, etc.) aren’t returned promptly, but it is definitely a two way street. I wouldn’t go dropping off a pie plate at someone’s house (let’s end the sentence there) and expect it back anytime soon.

Well, the telephone is installed, but we are still waiting on a call back from the telephone company before we can get the internet hooked-up. We’ll keep our fingers crossed on this one.


Thursday, January 27, 2005
We got a membership at Tsutaya the other day, which will mean something for the Japan based readers. It’s a video rental shop headquarted in Japan. In Thailand the VCD is a very popular format and Tsutaya carries more VCDs than DVDs. The VCDs are all dubbed in Thai and without setup options, so I am reliant on the limited DVD collection, still not too bad at about a dollar a day to rent a film. Still waiting on the internet connection. I have the modem set up, but the woman at the phone company claims it might take the system a while to recognize my account. Am I to believe that even inanimate technology like computer terminals and wires function in the same lackadaisical manner that the people here do?
Yesterday we went to aerobics for the second time. There’s a lake in the city around which is a pedestrian path used by lots of joggers and walkers. At several points there are outdoor recreational facilities and in one place there is something stadium like in which they have big aerobics classes. It costs a whooping 5baht, 15cents to attend. You drop your change into little boxes near the entrance on the ‘honor’ system. I am actually a bit sore from the class.
The school administrator called me yesterday asking if I was available for another weekend class. Of course the answer was ‘yes’. I asked if it was going to start this coming weekend. “Oh well, I still have to check if there are enough people interested.” This is what I find interesting about Thailand – there seems to be endless speculation on what could be done, than checking with all parties involved and some more delays, than confirmation with one party, then the next, then back to the first party to make sure that in the interim plans haven’t changed, and then checking with the second party to the same end. It’s not so different from Japan, except the time frame seems more fluid and certainly longer. As a teacher I find it a bit exasperating, but I can only imagine what it would be like for the students. For instance, the school wants to start a TOEFL class and they have some interest, but not enough yet. The lady has called about five people and told them about the class. Ostensibly they have agreed to join, but she hasn’t given them any definitive date. She must have given some sort of tentative date without commitment. Then she tells me (after postponing the class indefinitely due to lack of enough interest) that another student is interested. What are all of these people doing? Waiting by their telephones hoping for a call? I think not. They are after all Thai and probably think this is the norm, nonetheless tests have specific dates and test courses should be run in order to prepare people, and here’s the key word, prior to the test. I imagine even in Thailand the big schools must set course dates and follow through on them regardless of class capacity. Who knows? I’ll just hope for the best.

I am still not online, nor do I believe that I will ever be at this rate, despite the fact that the modem is connected and the phone is on. The initial diagnosis of “one hour” has turned into several days before the system will recognize me. The lady also added unsolicited that foreigners often get impatient about such things. This is an attitude that I have encountered in Japan as well. It cruxes on stereotyping people in order to waive any responsibility for one’s incompetence by shifting the onus of a mistake onto the “foreigner”, as it were. It is paramount to saying “I’m going to screw up, but don’t you dare complain because that would be just like a foreigner, and you don’t want to act like a foreigner, now do you?” And the truth is that I often fall for the routine in an effort to not reinforce stereotypes. Once anyone pulls out this line of thought on you it is very hard to combat, unless you are someone who just does not give a shit how you or other “foreigners” are viewed. For me, I see a large part of my efforts as an overseas educator being the negation of stereotypes, so it is very hard when I see myself stepping into one. Not so much that I care how I am individually perceived, but I often think of the next foreigner who is going to interact with this person (in this case the woman at the phone company). Are they going to be on the receiving end of some crap treatment because of me? I am sure that I have been the victim of bad foreigner on more than one occasion. Without going into trivial detail, I’ll recount one such episode. Basically, near where I worked in Japan one video store had an unfair policy toward foreigners. It consisted of a surplus of documentation, plus a Japanese person as a guarantor before getting a membership. Imagine that. You actually need a Japanese adult, and evidently anyone would suffice, to get a freakin’ video member’s card. If I had had more free time I can think of a homeless bum who would have gotten a free lunch for coming to the store with me. Anyway, one of the teachers I worked with went through the process of getting a membership and then admitted to some real juvenile shit in dealing with the store – late returns that consisted of leaving a tape on the counter and running out before anyone saw her. It’s almost hard to get upset at people for their views when stuff like that happens. Of course a Japanese person could do the same, but I definitely noticed a lot of younger ESL types pulling shit that was immature and stupid in Japan, and though I can’t say for sure I believe that being abroad may have contributed to this.


Saturday, January 29, 2005
I have four hours of teaching today. Not a lot compared to what I used to do, but it is funny that when that is the only thing on your schedule you put a lot of forethought into it. So the current schedule is four hours on Saturday and Sunday meaning that on Friday I am starting to gear up for my work week. I really hope that the TOEFL class opens soon because now that everything has been bought there’s not a hell of a lot to do during the day. I suppose another car wash might be in order as I screwed up the last one pretty good.

A decent day on the teaching front. I had a “general English” class that consisted of 10 adult learners. The age range was about 25-40 and they were all fairly low level. I love it how administrators, novice teachers and students themselves often think that a “general conversation” class is easy to teach. First of the appellation general is a load of shit. Has anyone had a general conversation ever?

“Nice day, huh?”
“Yeah, where were you born?”
“New York. Are there many rooms in your house?”

It’s a complete load of shite from the beginning. Granted there has to be some term to designate such a class. My real gripe is that people think that talking about “general” things is quite easy. One of the co-directors of my school told me that the class would be easy because it was just a general class without levels, so I could talk about what I liked. Well, I don’t think that we’ll be talking about Skaldic verse or migratory patterns of the red-chested gibbon, which means we ain’t talking about what I like. Really, I think these kind of non-descript, do-what-you-like classes are as challenging a thing as exists. Give me a test course any day. Something intricate with lots of material to get through is what makes the life of an experienced ESL teacher bearable. That is the key reason why I always loathed the Nova conversation lounge – there was no teaching involved. I have never been a wonderful conversationalist as my girlfriend will no doubt attest to, and only with a beer in my handed do I actually enjoy long periods of jaw flapping. The above considered, it was still a relatively good lesson and imparting things to a group of ten is far more dynamic and challenging for a teacher than facing four in a class as I did at Nova. It’s more tiring as well. Maybe I am just out of the work routine. My second class of the day went well enough, but the more I look for differences between Thai and Japanese students, the less I find. The two guys in my class today were participating to a fair degree, but they weren’t really trying to expand on any ideas. It was enough that they were answering the question. This may have to do with confusion about learner roles, but some of the hesitancy I see looks to conform to a Thai ideal of behavior that really isn’t that far off at all from the Japanese. Sure enough one of the other teachers I was talking with today pulled out the old “Japanese are boring” stereotype while admitting he had never been there. Not that he’s wrong, but the guy has been in Thailand five years. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that there wasn’t a huge difference… except of course in salary.

Two stories I have come across recently. Collateral with Tom Cruise is a slick looking, talking action movie with plot holes the size of canyons. I actually enjoyed the Cruise character as the existential spouting hit man. I thought the Jamie Foxx character (for which he was nominated best supporting actor) was ok, though a bit too sniveling. The funny thing about the mediocre film is when you actually start to think about the story it becomes frustratingly implausible. It works when you watch it the first time because it moves quickly enough without trying to over justify itself, but I couldn’t watch it a second time. The other story, book I have been reading is The Fourth Hand by John Irving. I would call myself a fan of the author, but this book is not at all one of his best. It is a bit reminiscent of his early work The 158 Pound Marriage. It is supposed to be comic, but he uses too many facile devices – the worst of which is several conversations with Japanese people who confuse r and l sounds. This gag was stale in Lost in Translation and it ain’t any funnier here. Evidently, Irving thinks if he includes a lot of zany characters and situations in a novel than it is comedy. I think he should stick to the melodramas. Definitely can’t recommend this book at all.

Monday, January 31, 2005
There was a glimmer of hope that I would be online today as the weekend is done and the latest excuse is that no one in Khon Kaen has an ADSL connection temporarily. I think the word “tomorrow” was thrown about again, but as we all now tomorrow never comes. Well, my work week over I can finally relax for the next five days. All this free time should be a good thing, but it is hard getting motivated about any single task when you have a whole day to do it. I think I’ll make myself a coffee and run through my Thai verbs once more.

My apologies to anyone who has been checking this and hoping for more consistent updates. The moving process has been a busy one and I still don't have a phone line, though now am moved into a rental house and in possession of a new automobile. I hope to get some pictures online soon, but as I am dependent on the internet cafe I'm not sure when that will be. It seems that I have also found a job at a small language school that looks quite interesting, but I'm not 100% on the conditions yet. They want to hire me full time for several months and then knock me down to part time, then full time again. Obviously this is not the ideal, so we are now 'negotiating'. I have agreed to teach one class a week for them in the interim, so we'll see. With the house and new car - Honda Jazz (compact hatchback) I feel like a regular member of the Thai middle class. I also dropped a small fortune on furniture, so I really hope that Khon Kaen works out. It seems fairly livable so far. We live in a quiet neighborhood with a bit too much trash on the ground, but otherwise nice. The city has lots of cheap eataries and a small lake in the center next too which the Thais engage in free aerobics classes - something we are supposedly going to take up. In any case, I do hope to get some pictures of the house and car online, so maybe sometime in the next several weeks. Till things get sorted on the internet at home I probably will post only sporadically. Later

Still feeling a bit of the affects of the dietary change, though this morning things seem to have sorted themselves out. Yesterday was another interesting day. We found ourselves a rental house. The process for doing this is pretty simple. There don't seem to be many real estate agency around, so we just paid a tuk-tuk driver to take us around to various housing developments. Typically these places have some sort of security guard manning a gate. The guard is usually well informed as to what is available. Yesterday, we stopped in to look at an apartment building that was renting studio apartments for 4,000 baht. About five minutes out of town we saw a small, yet new,villa style house that we both liked. One of the neighbors called up the owner who arrived about half-an-hour later. We reached an oral agreement (we'll sign the papers today) for 3,500 baht a month for a six month contract. It even has a small front yard. Check out the link below for some pictures of Koh Chang.

http://community.webshots.com/user/mattheweric

The alien has had a bit of a disappointing New Year. Last night was a bit of a bust- we returned to our hotel room here in Khon Kaen before midnight - and today I spent most of the day in the hotel room with a slight fever and not so slight bout of the runs, which kept me running to the toilet. Not the auspicious start to 2005 that I would have liked, but we'll keep a positive attitude. Tomorrow is apt./house searching if I can muster the strength.

Wednesday, December 22, 2004
Today we were up early and had breakfast about 9ish and after a couple of hours on the beach we rented a scooter and toured the island in the afternoon, albeit slowly as I didn’t want to become on of those vacation horror stories that occur all to frequently with two-wheeled vehicles and tourists. Koh Chang is probably the best beach we’ve been to in terms of compromise between what I like and what Pocky likes. It’s beautiful and clean with a fair amount of vegetation right up to the shoreline. It even has those tree with trunks that lean out over the water and whose name escapes someone with the vegetal knowledge of myself – that’s like carnal knowledge, but, oh never mind. On the other hand there are far too many Germans and vendors for my liking. The happy medium seems to be the choice of restaurants and drinking establishments. Although Malaysia (the Perhentians) was idyllic and isolated, we were reliant on a poor, and poorly managed hotel restaurant for all our dining. I suppose that what pleases both parties is really for the best – minimizing complaints, hence tension.

Thursday, December 23, 2004,
One thing I really like about Thailand right off the bat, is that there aren’t the same space issues that exist in Japan. With about half the population of Nippon and approximately the same land area population density isn’t close to as high in the Land of Smiles.

Friday, December 24, 2004
Slowly, but surely the relentless train of vendors and parade of tattooed Germanics are starting to get me down on Koh Chang. Not that I’m rescinding my initial diagnosis in terms of what is the ideal balance for us as a couple, it’s just that this beach seems to have answered the unposed question, “What do people do when not making Mercedes?” The other bit about the vendors is a tricky one. Certainly, the locals should have a chance to cash in on the tourist boom, and it is more than obvious that the ambulant beach hawkers are on the lowest end of the economic ladder – many of them are selling massage or cheap trinkets that would require little outlay of capital, nonetheless there really should be some regulations surrounding how many of them are allowed to roam the beach. It felt like every thirty seconds the sunlight was blocked out by one of these blockheads. No, really, I empathize, but I can’t see how non-regulated beach vending will have anything, but a long-term negative effect on tourism. Then again, maybe I’m wrong – Koh Samui doesn’t appear to suffer for them. As for regulating Germans and Swedes… I’m all for it.
On the upside, I had an utterly relaxing moment about fifty meters off the beach lazing on a floatation device looking back at shoreline. It really is spectacular. The palms trees shoot up from the white sand and there are heavily treed mountains just behind the beach that contrast nicely with the foreground. The hotels and bungalows are, for the most part, hidden behind the greenery. I truly had one of those moments where you think anyone who isn’t me right now is a real sucker. It’s good to be alive. The sunset was also superb. I’m no sun worshipper. Both Pocky and I have been heading to restaurants, internet cafes and hotel rooms between the hours of one and four to avoid the brunt of the sun, and in the morning we basically hang in the shade of a palm tree. In spite of my solarphobia, there really is something about the beach that I find extremely pleasant. It may be the lack of obligation to do anything, the ability to gaze across the horizon, or just some mysterious quality of land meeting sea. In any case, I am glad I came.

Saturday, December 25, 2004
Time has melted and morphed to make for the quickest five days of my life. I really don’t know what we did, but it wasn’t much. Another great day on the beach, the weather has been nothing short of immaculate the whole time we’ve been here. I was contemplating the life I’ve left versus the one I’m starting as I lay floating on the raft today. It’s funny, I feel like it’s just another vacation and the day after tomorrow will see me back at work, but of course that isn’t the case. Part of me thought that I would never leave Nova; it was such an easy gig, probably a bit too easy. I don’t think I’ll miss the monotonous teaching aspect of the job, though I’m sure I’ll miss the paycheck and the friends. Whatever’s in store for me next, I can unequivocally say that my time in Japan was well spent and just a few days out of the routine has made me believe that my choice in moving on was also the right one. The day to day of work and life in Japan wasn’t bad, but the least I can say is that my horizons were not expanding. I’m already getting into the Thai language a bit, more interestingly is simply observing the way people interact here – markedly different from the Japanese.

Wednesday, December 29, 2004
An interesting last several days, on Sunday we made our way back to Bangkok and spent the night on the infamous backpacker-cum-tourist haven, Khao San Road. Incidentally, a huge tidal wave hit the Andaman Sea on Sunday. Fortunately for us, we were staying on the other side, the Gulf of Siam. After a long bus ride on Sunday, we repeated the same feat on Monday to make our way slowly (six hours) to Khon Kaen. We rented a car and headed off to Nong Sao, pronounced like the cutting instrument, where we arrived at eightish.
So, I find myself back in the village. It’s always a great place for a bit of introspection and philosophizing on the state of man. Of course, this is an internal process as none of the villagers can speak even rudimentary English and my Thai is faltering at best, and my Lao non-existent. I imagine that the etymology of the word privacy may have some relationship to the word privy, the loo, in short, the vestibule where one passes water and moves one’s bowels. In the village the idea of privacy doesn’t exist, even in the privy, as it were. The villagers truly live a communal lifestyle. Visiting the village is like taking a trip back in the history of human development. Here we find ourselves in the heart of a group-oriented, agricultural society. At some point in the development of any nation such a lifestyle must have existed, at least for a brief space in time. The morning market must resemble something that existed in New England in the 19th century. To be sure, barter is not practiced, but human societies have been using money-currencies for some time. I once saw an anthropological documentary talking about the development of the human dwelling. According to the show, it was a great step forward when humans started to divide their dwellings into individual rooms. When the human was afforded some deal of privacy his/her intellectual development jumped ahead. In Nong Sao most houses still seem quite communal in design. It got me to thinking about human progress. We build as a group, but create as individuals. Great manpower is required to run electricity wires across a country, a group effort is necessary in building hydro-electric damns, and other power plants, but if not for Thomas Edison where would the idea of electricity sprung forth? Yes, some other individual might have made the discovery, but that is, in the end, the point; an individual sparked on an idea and the group implemented it. There is no conclusion here, nor will I attempt to bring this full-circle to refer to Nong Sao, however the village certainly does inspire me to consider humanity as an ever-evolving species and human society as a work in progress. Perhaps in the future I will try to synthesize a bit of the loss and gain in developed nations versus the developing nations, or is it more to the point to talk about the urban versus the rural, the city and the village.
We did something rather fascinating today; at least it was fascinating for me. We went out and saw some kind of Buddhist soothsayer/healer. We traveled several villages over and stopped at non-descript village house. Inside the house was a room that had been converted into something temple-like. A woman, the woman, sat on a sort of alter, her back to an image of Buddha surrounded by statues, pictures and other various religious paraphernalia. Most interestingly was that on her right side was a rotund water vessel and on her left and vase embossed with Chinese characters that served as a spittoon. I invite the reader to envision the scene. An older lady who evidently had some sort of stomach ailment approaches the woman on her knees, she prostrates herself three times in the Buddhist tradition, the healer/soothsayer/beetle nut chewer recites something I assume to be in Pali, then she takes a big gulp of water from a ladle that she dipped into the vessel on her right. Now this is where it gets good for the non-familiar, e.g. me. The spiritual medium, tooth-gap large, lady, then spits the water all over the ailing woman’s naked torso. Then our water/beetle-nut juice expectorating friend lights a bundle of candles and runs the flames over the saliva and H20 doused area, all the while reciting more Pali. She repeated the same thing for another woman, but this time on the woman’s head – Suffering from migraines? Try a mouthful of this. – Finally, she called my girlfriend and I forward despite protests from myself (I was assured that it would just be talking, implying no oral imitations of a fire hose). The lady rubbed some gold flecks into my palms and forehead, and continually uttered “three years” in Thai. Evidently, that was some type of prediction. Pocky thought the worse and assumed it meant our relationship would only last three years, but as there was no supplementary explanation, I tried to put a spin on it meaning we would be married in three years, or some other positive make believe. The world over fortune tellers pull the same racket. It consists of being as utterly vague as possible in order that they are never responsible for any mispredictions and are able to twist their mumbo-jumbo to fit any occasion. I apologize if I sound over judgmental. I could go in for the whole good luck thing, I do have certain Buddhist inclinations, and I don’t reject believing in the unseeable part and parcel, but don’t piss on my leg and tell me it’s raining. And, by all means, don’t spit water on me and mutter some arbitrary period of time!

Friday, December 31, 2004
The last day of the year and I can honestly say that I am glad to put 2004 in the history books. If we’re doing the obligatory year-in-review, then the theme of ’04 has to be work. Damn I busted my ass to get myself here. One vacation in May, but otherwise 6/7 day workweeks coupled with moving (twice) and endless errands (many) in prep to move to Thailand with some money in the bank. Unfortunately, the year end doesn’t mean an end to the moving or other chores. Anyway, it is good to close the Japan chapter as it felt like living in limbo for the last half year. I’ll hope for the best in ’05.
On a more mundane level, yesterday we went to Khon Kaen from the village. Ostensibly, we went to look for a place to stay, but really we were just bored and the town of Kalasin, the closest place to the village that isn’t a village, with its population of 40,000 has only one or two internet cafes filled with schoolboys playing video games, so it was a bit difficult to get on the net and check some info around Khon Kaen. KK is a university town with about 150,000 people, so a bit urban, very urban and urbane compared to Nong Sao. So there we were in the big city, we needed gas so we stopped in the same gas station/convenience store that we had rented our car from by pure chance. While getting gas Pocky asks about a real estate agency. The owner’s wife comes out, and guess what, just so happens that along with managing ‘servos’, Aussie for gas station/conbini, the owner happens to dabble in real estate development. Long story short, the guy drove us out to this housing development in progress. The houses are in the typical Mediterranean villa style that seems so popular with the upwardly mobile Thai. For purely informational purposes I allowed myself to be dragged through the various model houses. Actually fairly nice and with small yards that were nonetheless playing fields compared to what you find in Japan. The houses were going for about 70~90,000$, not bad considering that most of them had as much floor space as one would find in the average American home. Not that all of this house viewing got us anywhere closer to finding a place to live, but interesting all the same. After that song and dance I went to the internet café to find that most everyone I know has taken me for dead. The outpouring of concern was touching, but I wasn’t able to respond to most of the emails due to slow internet connection and some snag with sending a mass email. Oh well, I will heighten the drama when I announce my continued existence.

Oh yeah, I forgot the most salient bit of the day for the overseas reader. We bribed a cop. Well, actually it sounds more salacious than it is. Pocky was driving the rental car to Khon Kaen. This may have been a lapse in judgment due to the fact she doesn’t have a license – no one’s perfect. So we were going through an intersection with a rather poorly laid out traffic light that you can’t really see until you’re into the intersection itself. We were following a line of cars and the light turned red as we came through. Surprise, surprise there was a posse of Thai law enforcement officers camped out under a tent like they were having some kind of garden party (This is quite common along Thai highways). Actually, they weren’t having a garden party, they were fishing. And they caught a live one in us. So they waved us over and we shat our collective trousers because of the license, or lack thereof. The Kingdom’s finest pointed out the fact we had run a red light and asked for Pok’s license, which she had ‘left at home’. That’s ok because it turns out our representative of the local constabulary wanted to make a donation to the local temple and discretely dropped an envelope into Pok’s lap that she may aid in the said donation. Two hundred baht later (5$) we were forgiven our traffic code violation. The officer also wanted to know where I was from, if we had children and if I was ‘a good foreigner’. We assured him I wasn’t some dirty Burmese refugee and he smiled and waved us on our way. All and all, I think we got off pretty well. Imagine in the US driving without a license and paying the arresting officer a cup of coffee and donut to look the other way… I just have a hard time envisioning it.

This will be the second to last day I sit at home and wait for OT (tomorrow being the last). The end is truly in sight now. I have eleven days left and almost as many drinking engagements. I feel a lot more relaxed now that I have got everything, almost, out of the way. One thing about leaving a place is the interminable goodbye parties that go on. I now realize it is impossible to both be a good friend and not get roped into more of this farewell shindigs than my liver and wallet can really afford. Certainly I want to say my goodbyes, but it is funny the people that you weren't really great friends with that crawl out of the woodwork and want multiple get-togethers right before you go. I shouldn't complain about having friends, on the other hand when I get to Thailand I'm looking forward to boring nights of sobriety... and maybe something else.

Winding up to wind down and completely wound up. Well, it appears as if OT has utterly dried up in my company, as well as planning periods for those of us, like me, who are ostensibly in charge of the branches we work at. It might just be the ideal moment to jump off the Nova boat, if it weren't for the gadloads of money they throw at me for flapping my jaw - relative to teaching in Thailand of course. I think I've got everything pretty much cleared up minus a couple things to be sold, thrown out or given away. The social calendar is really starting to fill. In fact, I got a bit of a surprise visit from Molly Fitzpatrick the other day. She was returning from Southeast Asia where she was doing some work related to a travel agency she works for. Living at home in Keene, she was bemoaning life in the US a bit, which always makes me feel justified in my choice not to return and take up my rightful place as an entry level insurance salesman, or junior department manager at Walmart. Plus, Molly assures me that all Americans are just as discontent as their televisions and print publications tell them they should be. Actually, now that I understand and can read Japanese, the very same thing could happen to me, so it must be the ideal moment to haul my ass out of here and to some place where three square is a worthy accomplishment.

Elated by W’s victory I decided to take the day off work; it
‘s my company after all, I’ll do as I please. Turning the key in the ignition, I rev the engine of my Suburban several times in a symbolic gesture to those who would cripple America’s oil supply. Although I have the time and the McDonald’s is not crowded, I opt out of eating in. Instead I order my Big Mac Super-Sized Meal via the drive-thru (eating while driving is a true act of Patriotism and I’ll do anything American on this fine day). After washing down the burger and fries with one of those gargantuan Cokes that resemble a carton more than cup I find a parking space on the main street. A shelter-impaired individual sits on the street with an empty Starbuck’s coffee cup full of change. I’m feeling so good Junior’s back in office that I give the man a swift kick to the face (instead of the ass where he needs it) and grab his cup of change, thereby enabling him to reclaim his financial independence, rather than leeching of the system. In what could only be described as serenedipiditious coincidence I notice the meter has expired on a parking space in which sits a Mercedes E class. Using my newly acquired change, I fill the meter and help out the unfortunate owner of such a fine piece of engineering (albeit not American, but our unknown driver is no doubt Republican, so I forgive this). In a celebratory mood, I make my way into Mike’s Gun Emporium and treat myself to a little number that I’ve had my eye on since the assault rifle ban ended last month. It’s an AR15 with telescoping stock, a 30 round magazine and bayonet fix. Thanks to my man George I can finally get my hands on this little guy. Back into the Suburban, I aim it homewards. On the way, I spot two long-faced liberals pulling up Kerry/Edwards signs. I roll down my window and pump several rounds into the damn Democrats. The Bible tells me ‘Thou shall not kill’, but truly these guys did not love America. At home I turn on my Direct TV to further revel in the win. Tonight I will make love to my wife for the first time in months (so what if she’s overweight, more than half of the population is, which is just about the same percentage of people who got GWB back in office). My wife loves America and so do I. We will fall asleep, ensconced in our Martha Stewart (BTW, insider trading isn’t such a big deal IMO) bedspread that is in the design of Old Glory, the American Flag. I will pray to the Lord thanking him for once again putting Bush/Cheney in the White House where they belong. God Bless America.

Sitting at home waiting for a call for OT. I've been going at it like mad. I already have 29hours this month. I had 46hours last month. All this work doesn't leave for much time and what little free time I've had has been spent doing an online TEFL course (Teaching English as a Foreign Language) . I've succesfully sent off three boxes of stuff to Thailand and Jenjira is moving out of Bangkok next month to live with her mother up north until I come. We plan to live in a city called Khon Kaen, but in the interim she'll stay in her hometown, which isn't so far from KK. My course of vaccinations are almost done and next week I'll pick up a tourist visa at the Royal Thai Embassy of Tokyo. Almost there. It's been an extremely stressful half year for me. I'm sad to be leaving Japan, but definitely looking forward to the move.

Back at this after a long time absent. I logged 56 lessons of OT in the month of July, hence only two days off. Due to this work intensive lifestyle, I haven't had much time for anything of interest. All work and no play makes Matt a dull boy. I plan to keep up at this pace until December when I move to Thailand. My apologies for lack of wry prosiac insights into life in Asia, but I''ve never felt more Japanese than when doing fifty plus hour weeks.